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If you have not met a fellow Golden Retriever friend of mine, Mackenzie Ray, you should. She is the mascot of Four Legged Media, and she even has her own blog, where she shares nuggets of her wisdom with the rest of us. When she first graced her parents with her presence, they swore that she would not sleep in their bed. Well, it did not take long for them to break that rule, and now she sleeps with them every night. Dad noted that there are no issues (covers-stealing, snoring, fan-blocking, etc.), she stays at the foot of the bed, but he and Mom cannot help but wonder if this a good habit they have got into or if they should we put a stop to it.
My answer to Mackenzie’s dad, and anyone else with the same question, is this: once you and your dog have established the pack order, there should be no problems allowing the dog on the bed. Of course, this is providing that you have established yourself as the alpha. I have a king-sized bed that I sleep in, usually with Mom. Sleeping in a comfy bed or on a cozy sofa are privileges reserved for those higher ranking pack members.
Problems begin when humans allow their dogs in these place of privilege, and they do not keep establishing their own rightful place as the alpha. Every once in a while, Mom makes me get off of the bed or the couch. When she does that, she is reinforcing her position as the alpha. Mom also insists that she go through the doorway first. She eats dinner before we are fed. All of these behaviors are a signal to me that she is the one in control.
Another concern raised by Mackenzie’s Dad was in regard to playing roughly, because usually, at some point in the day, he gets into a wrestling match with Mackenzie. The wrestling is all in fun, and they both seem to enjoy it, but he noticed that during this play, Mackenzie can get “mouthy.” The nips and soft mouth bites are nothing serious, since she knows that it is just playtime, but he wonders if this is a bad habit to get into. Mackenzie seems to know that she cannot play this roughly with her Mom, but there is still the concern that Mackenzie may not really understand the difference between playmates.
Like we discussed yesterday, sometimes we like to play rough, both with each other and with the humans that belong to us. The way to ensure that rough play does not escalate into something troublesome, is to ensure that you always initiate the play, and that you always end the play. Mom is a master at this, because there are times when I want to play with her, and I will try to start a play session. Usually, I try to do something extra cute and bring her the toy I want to play with. Even after all of these efforts, Mom just ignores me.
We can sense if there is a weakness in a person, and we adjust our behavior accordingly. That being said, we ARE dogs, and at any time, we may return back to our comfort zone of dog behavior. That behavior could be barking, jumping, biting or chasing. That is why training us is so important. A human should be able to regain control of a situation with the use of a single word, like OFF or COME.
Last September, a reader adopted what they think is a Rottweiler/German Shepherd mix puppy from a rescue at approximately eight weeks of age. Throughout most of her puppyhood, she had a very timid personality, and she was always extra cautious of people and inanimate objects, but she was always very playful with and intrigued by other dogs. Now, the family is starting to notice some behavior at 1 ½ years old that is disturbing to them. 
